


bells of christmas

by vannral



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: Awkwardness, Christmas Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 19:30:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9007372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vannral/pseuds/vannral
Summary: Credence and Newt, Christmas and quite awkward attempts to give gifts and confess.





	

**Author's Note:**

> *throws the fic in* Enjoy these two awkward nerds pining for each other and being head over heels in love and really it's super stupid and ridiculous and disjointed. I'm ridiculous, i'm sorry. Happy holidays everyone!

The kitchen smells of sweet gingerbread, cinnamon and warm mulled wine. Credence closes his eyes, just drinking it all in; he can taste the sugar on his tongue, sticky and rich, and he can hear Queenie and Jacob bickering lovingly by the stove.

_(”that does not look like a bowtruckle, jake!”)_

Tina's sitting in the arm chair in the living room, softly snoring; her head's lolled to the side. Credence hesitates, but tugs a blanket over her, making sure she's warm enough and turns – and nearly collides into Newt's chest.

     ”Oh, hello”, Newt says warmly, his eyes crinkling with obvious amusement as he catches to steady Credence. He almost _glows_ in the flickering fire, and Credence's heart jolts and flutters, heat rushing to his face.

     ”Hi”, he breathes and manages to smile. It's still a bit wavering, fragile thing, but Credence is determined to get better at it. Newt makes it easy.

Newt's hand twitches and almost without thinking, he brushes gently Credence's chin with his thumb.

     ”Everything all right?”

     ”Yeah”, Credence says, his head still slightly reeling at the close contact. ”I mean, she – I thought she might – want a blanket?”

     ”Yes, good, that is – good thinking. Yes.” Newt straightens, and looks away, clears his throat and suddenly looks very awkward.

     ”Are you okay?” Credence asks nervously, afraid of the answer.

Newt's head snaps back to him, blinking his pale eyes. ”What? Yes, of course, I'm sorry – tad distracted. It's _not_ your fault, I'm sorry, Credence, it's very rude of me”, he rambles, rubs the back of his neck, and there's a slight flush on his high cheekbones.

     ”A – are you sure? Can I help with anything?”

Newt's expression softens. ”No, but thank you – for – for offering.” He glances again at Credence, warmly and in a way that makes Credence's breathing hitch, but he's not the best judge of expressions, so he just nods helplessly and not at all comforted.

     ” - _no, Jake!”_ Queenie giggles from the kitchen. ”We can't sell _these!”_

Startled Credence looks up. ”I'm sorry, Credence, please, excuse me”, Newt says and ducks to the stairs and away from the view.

Credence feels a strange kind of _ache_ in his chest; he thinks of a small, scruffy parcel wrapped in cheap brown paper, hidden in his room, and the thought makes him want to bite nails. He wants to give it to Newt, has been wanting to give it for _weeks now,_ but the thought fills him with clawing anxiety and fear.

What if Newt doesn't like it? What if he thinks it's ridiculous? Credence feels silly for thinking this way, Newt has been absolutely _wonderful_ and patient with him, he has never laughed at Credence no matter how stupid things he asks, no matter _what..._

_But..._

But this time it's Christmas, and it's personal and almost – _intimate._

Credence's cheeks turn pink.

It's weird, to _want,_ but he's been slowly getting used to it. But. (oh _god, how he hates that word.)_ He has no illusions about Newt, not really; he's very, absolutely, _extremely_ sure that his feelings are very much one-sided, and – and it's okay. Newt has already done so much for him – taken him in, protected him, _been his friend,_ without wanting anything back.

How could someone like Credence ever deserve something _more_ from someone like Newt? Wonderful, amazing Newt, who is just as awkward with people as Credence is, Newt, who has absolutely _zero_ sense of self-preservation when magical beasts are concerned (seriously, Credence has probably developed an _ulcer from worrying alone),_ Newt, who _cares so much._

Feeling uncertain, Credence follows gleeful laughter and peeks into the kitchen. Jacob is wearing pink oven mittens and there's a happy smile on his face; Queenie's hair is tousled and she's beaming. It's a very happy sight, and it makes warmth bloom in Credence.

     ”They're havin' fun, right?” Tina's soft voice asks behind him, and Credence is proud how he doesn't flinch. She's wrapped the blanket around her like a cape, and she still looks a bit sleepy. 

     ”Yeah. Did – did we wake you?”

     ”You and Newt?” Tina arches an eyebrow with amusement. ”If I have to watch _that_ train wreck one more time, I think I might have to throttle someone.”

Credence chokes on the air. ”I – uh, I'm sorry?”

     ” _Really,_ Credence, it's a miracle you two can get _two words across_ and yet manage to convey just how deeply you adore each other.”

     ”Miss _Tina - !”_

     ” _What?”_ Tina hushes back. ”Because seriously _,_ Credence, you two are making my teeth hurt.”

Credence scowls. ”It's not – he doesn't – why are you being like that?”

     ”Because it gets _tiring,_ watching you two pine and look sad, when you think no one sees.”

     ”He's - he's not pining.”

     ”Oh, _yes,_ he is. Very totally is so. I saw him walk into a tree, when he saw you petting those mooncalves.”

     ”If – if - ” Credence breathes deeply, trying to gather his thoughts. It's hard to think. ”If you're t – teasing me, miss Tina, I'm gonna – gonna be very annoyed.” It doesn't sound threatening, but he _hates_ how his heart just shivers and flutters in foolish hope.

Tina's amused smile diminishes slightly, and she looks serious. ”I'm not. I wouldn't tease you, not about that.”

     ”He's not gonna want that with _me - ”_

     ”You are very wrong, Credence.”

     ”I – I _am_ not, please, he - ” Credence trails off desperately. He doesn't want to ruin his friendship with Newt; Newt doesn't feel the same, and then it'll be awful and _awkward_ and Credence has _done it_ and Newt is gonna _hate him -_

     ”Stop. Whatever is going through your head, stop right there”, Tina orders.

     ”It – I don't think it really works like that?”

     ”Hush. It does. Credence, honey, please, _please_ listen to me. You are good and amazing and we love you. No matter what.” Tina bites her lip. ”You don't have to do anything you don't want to, of course not, but if you're wondering...tell him.”

Credence gapes at her, his heart twisting and coiling painfully, tearing itself in half between hope, _that awful, wonderful hope,_ and dread. But Tina doesn't lie, that much Credence knows. She has never lied, not to him.

Her eyes are kind in the dim light and she brushes her lips gently on his forehead.

+

The next evening, it takes Credence a little while to gather courage to approach Newt's door. His heart pounds, clawing and thundering, hot blood rushing in his ears, burning nausea rolling in his guts. This is a bad idea. A very bad, awful, not good idea. Yet he’s still standing there.

_Why – why am I standing here?_ Credence thinks miserably, his trembling fingers clutching the little parcel. He notices he's wrapped it's corners are really awfully.

It's such an _ugly parcel._

Feeling horribly awkward with every passing second, Credence chews his lip.

_‘Tell him’._

_He's not pining._

Tina's matter-of-fact voice says: ‘ _You are very wrong, Credence’._

_Would he...would he want that w – with me?_

His instinct that sounds too much like _Mary Lou,_ tells him, _no-no-he-wouldn't, of course not, why would he, stupid boy -_

But – but – still, Credence has _learnt_ so much, he's seen _so much genuine kindness and experienced real happiness and -_  

     ”Credence?”

Eyes wide, Credence's head snaps up. _Oh, no. No, no._ Newt stands at the doorway, head curiously tilted, his hair tousled. Credence panics. This is too fast, he's not ready, _probably not ever_  - _why did he come here, nope -_

     ”O – oh, I – I didn't mean to disturb you – y – you're probably busy, s – so I'm just gonna – gonna _go - ”_ Credence rambles, cheeks burning red, eyes staring _everywhere_ but Newt. Oh, this is such a _bad idea,_ he wants to disappear –

Without thinking – how it seems to be lately – Newt moves forward and grabs Credence’s wrist. He looks just as startled as Credence feels, and for a moment, they just _look_ at each other. Finally Newt finds his voice.

     “You are not disturbing me, Credence”, Newt says, “not ever.”

     “O – oh.” Credence isn’t sure what to do with that sort of information. Newt looks at him, under his messy hair, his lips twitch into a nervous smile.

_Okay. Okay,_ Credence thinks a little desperately and hands New the parcel before he starts to hyperventilate. His fingers are trembling.

Newt blinks. “Oh, what’s this?”

Credence swallows, quite certain his whole face is red and blotched. “I – it’s a – um, a Christmas present”, he stutters, and out of his mouth, it sounds the most ridiculous thing _ever._

Newt lifts his head, and he looks at Credence with a strange expression. Then, he says: “Oh, _Credence.”_

A horrible feeling sinks into Credence, and he panics.

     “You don’t have to – to, you know – a – accept it, if  - if you don’t _want – “_ he starts to blabber, but Newt –

Newt’s _looking_ at him.

Looking at him, like he’s something utterly amazing and brilliant.

And he smiles. A real, shining, _beaming_ smile, revealing Newt’s dimples, making his freckles glow in the dim light all golden.

     “Thank you”, he breathes and asks: “Can I come closer?”

Credence has always appreciated that in Newt. He nods, mutely.

Newt steps closer, brushes his fingers against the nape of Credence’s neck and pulls their foreheads together.

     “Thank you, Credence”, he repeats, his words sounding rough and _sweet._  “You are amazing.”  

Credence laughs, and it sounds a bit hysterical, even in his own ears. “Y – you don’t even know what it is.”

     “It’s from you”, Newt points out with a gentle grin. “That’s what counts, and what I’ll treasure.”

Credence knows what to do with _that_ knownledge even less. He stammers: “Oh.”

     “Can I open it?”

     “Y – yes?”

After glancing at Credence warmly, Newt carefully unwraps the present, to reveal a book cover. Credence thought it was nice, when he saw it – it’s lovely, smooth leather, bound by crimson silk ribbons and on it’s cover is a beautiful silver-white illustration of a unicorn.

Newt’s fingers stop. He inhales. Credence _panics._

     “D – do you – if – if you _don’t_ like it, you can – um, return it? I think – “

     “You _are a marvel.”_

Credence _gapes._ “I’m sorry?”

     “No, no, you are. An absolute marvel”, Newt says, his light hazel eyes shining and so _genuine it hurts to look at him._ “Thank you. It’s – oh, Credence, it’s more than I deserve, it’s absolutely wonderful. Thank you.”

Cheeks turning bright pink in pleasure, shyness and embarrassment, Credence mumbles: “I – I thought you might like it?”

     “Oh, I love it. It’s…oh, it’s an amazing gift. Thank you.”

Credence, who thinks his heart might very much _explode_ if Newt continues to talk _and_ look at him like _that,_ clears his throat and says: “I’m glad you like it.”

     “Yes. That reminds me, I have your gift.”

_That_ makes Credence pause. “My – _my_ gift?”

Newt looks fondly amused. “Of course. I – you are important to me, so I – “ He clears his throat, turns and gestures Credence to come into his room. It’s a bit messy in Newt’s room, but in a cozy way, if that makes possible – Credence’s come to associate it with _home._

Meanwhile Newt has fished a gift from his bag – it’s not as badly as wrapped as Credence’s, but Credence still finds it very charming, all in it’s wrinkly paper.

     “You can open it, if you want”, Newt adds and pretends to be very much _non-twitchy,_ as Credence curiously rips the paper off.

When he sees it, he gapes. He just… _gapes._

It’s a Wizard’s Chess set. A pretty box full of glimmering chess pieces. It’s the same he’s seen in the Diagon Alley –

His hands start to tremble.

      “I – “ his voice _breaks,_ shakes, stops. Newt looks at him, worried.

     “Credence?”

Credence closes his eyes. It stings beneath his eyelids, _burns._ “H – how did you - ?” 

     “I – I remember you mentioning it when we arrived to London the first day?” Newt explains, his gaze moving to Credence’s face, worried and restless.

He _remembered. He remembered._ Remembered Credence asking about it, saw him _admiring_ and gawking at it, because moving chess pieces had been the most innocent and _magical thing_ Credence had ever seen, and –

oh, it’d been so enlightening.

Credence thinks he can’t breathe, his heart jolting and spasming, and it’s both terrifying and exciting and _oh –_

He kisses Newt. Without thinking, without fearing, he’s overwhelmed with adoration, fierce love for this man – this impossible man in a blue coat and even more impossible _suitcase full of fantastic beasts,_ Credence _kisses_ Newt, pouring all of his feelings into it.

Newt goes still for a moment – and before Credence pulls back, panicked, he feels a calloused hand brush the base of his neck, tilt him and kiss him back just as fervently, open-mouthed, messy and absolutely _burning._

Credence feels like flying. Flying and dancing and _laughing._ They part, Credence laughs breathlessly, and New’s thumb brushes his cheekbone.

     “Is this all right?” he asks, his voice deliciously rough.

     “Yes”, Credence nearly _gasps_ against his mouth, chasing after the kiss, his chest bursting with so much _happiness._ “Yes, yes, _please.”_

Newt flashes a grin; wide and happy – he nudges Credence affectionately with his nose, then tilts Credence’s head lightly and kisses him again.

     “Merry Christmas”, he murmurs.

     “Merry Christmas.”

+

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it, whatever this was! As always feedback is always welcome and please point out any grammar mistakes, not a native speaker here! Thanks for reading! :)


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